Going Back for the Girl

“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her.”  -  Ephesians 5:25

In many action movies, there’s a pivotal moment in the story that stands out. The hero is in the heat of the battle - the mission is urgent, the stakes are high, and everything is on the line. Explosions are going off, the enemy is closing in, and time is running out. The hero is charging forward, determined to complete his mission.

But suddenly, he stops. He looks back. There, behind him, is the burning building, the collapsing bridge, or the battlefield in chaos. And then it hits him - he remembers the girl. She’s still in danger. He pauses long enough to say, ”I have to go back for the girl.”

It’s a powerful moment because it reveals the hero’s true priorities. Yes, the mission is important, and yes, the stakes are high. But none of it matters more than the girl - the one he loves. He’s willing to put his life on the line, risk everything, and set aside his plans to go back for her.[i]
 
This story is a picture of what Ephesians 5:25 calls husbands to do. The verse says, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her.” Christ’s love for the church was sacrificial - He gave up everything, even His life, to save us. Husbands are called to reflect that same kind of love in their marriages.
 
Howard Hendricks, the beloved seminary professor, once demonstrated this principle in a different way. Someone asked him why he hadn’t written more books during his lifetime. Hendricks smiled and said, “I have four reasons,” and then he named his children. He could have poured more time into professional accomplishments, but instead, he chose to prioritize his family. Hendricks understood that his legacy wasn’t just about his career - it was about the love and time he gave to his wife and children.
 
Your wife and family don’t want to compete with your career, hobbies, or busy schedule. They don’t need you to be the hero for the world - they need you to be the hero for them. Sometimes, like the action hero in the movie, you need to stop in the middle of the chaos, turn around, and “go back for the girl” or your family.
 
Loving your family sacrificially isn’t about one grand gesture. It’s about the daily choices you make to show them they’re your priority. Like Christ’s love for the church, it’s intentional, selfless, and constant.
 
Reflection Question: What actions can you take this week to show your family they are your priority?

“Lord, thank You for the gift of my family. Help me to love them sacrificially and intentionally, just as You love me. Teach me to lay aside my own plans and priorities to show them how important they are. In Jesus’ Name, amen.”
 
[i] I originally heard this illustration from Mark Gungor in "The Tale of Two Brains."